I believe it is safe to assume that having a good self-esteem can assist you greatly during the course of your life experience. The posture you have when walking, talking at an interview, or prospecting a potential client does matter.
One of the most devastating ways people sabotage their success is by destroying their own self-esteem. Your self talk has huge influence over how you handle yourself. What do you talk to yourself about?
How many times have we been told how great we are, that our potential is unlimited, and there is simply nobody better for the job than we are. Just to turn around and slam ourselves, in our own mind, creating doubts and ultimately convincing ourselves that this is just not true. What you say to yourself does make a difference whether you think so or not.
As we, have been on the topic of positive versus negative thinking, there has been some intense debate. However, as a simple illustration for this article, it would be hard to imagine having great success in any venture, if you are constantly telling yourself it just isn’t possible. Take a look at sports for example. When you are playing in a tournament, do you enter into the contest thinking you are going to lose? That would be negative thinking. What is the likelihood you would win, when your expectations are that of defeat. In truth, when you enter into any tournament, your belief is that of winning. Therefore you are centered on positive thinking, expecting victory to be yours. If winning was such a negative experience, why would anyone play the game?
For years my self-esteem was terrible. Growing up obese, you can imagine the ridicule I was subjected to. That constant teasing definitely created a negative self image, and my self talk was anything but favorable. There were times I was so focused on my lack of self-esteem that I honestly wanted to die. When you believe life simply isn’t worth living, and your life truly stinks, your self talk will present reasons to validate your claim. What you say to yourself, when no one else can hear you, has major impact on who you are. Sooner or later, that image you have of yourself will shine through.
Obviously you cannot think positively all the time. Each of us will face times in our lives where it seems impossible to be positive about current circumstances we are facing. However, instead of giving up and dwelling on these depressing situations, thinking positively and seeking solutions to help overcome your challenges seems like the more logical thing to do.
“I am a big fat loser.” That is an example of negative thinking. “I am a great listener, friend, and lover.” That is a great example of positive thinking. We believe in affirming our values. Constantly reminding ourselves of the areas we are improving in and need to improve in. Give yourself praise when you make forward progress at becoming the person you were created to be. Since we are all sinners, and the evidence of negativity surrounds us in the World, we should make the decision to remain positive in our own minds.
As Winston Churchill said, “A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” A great illustration of positive vs. negative thinking!
If only it were true that one could live their entire life only experiencing positive results, how great would that be? Of course, what might be perfect to you, is a nightmare to someone else. That which is negative to me, might not be negative to you. This is where the debates could go on forever and ever as we all have different personalities, and process information differently. However, when talking to yourself, do you speak in a way that increases your self worth, or do you down yourself constantly? Some people feed off of their own negativity. They enjoy to fuel the anger that they already feel inside and add to their misery. Perhaps the reason they do this is simply to gain attention? Who knows….
“Whether you believe you can or you can’t, you’re right!” – Anonymous
What you say to yourself is important. Positive, Negative, Encouraging, Discouraging, Good, Bad, it is what it is…… Your self talk could be the difference between living your dreams or settling for mediocrity.
“If great is available, good isn’t good enough!” – Anonymous
In Christ,
Ron